Domme Group last night

The Dommes' Group that I went to last night was the absolute shot of positivity in the arm that I needed. It was so nice to be part of a community again. The women were all very cool, and it felt empowering to be around such like-minded, good people.

And yes, there were hopeful single boys. I had a lovely talk with one of them. He was gracious, sweet, polite and respectful: something that gave me encouragement that there are good submissive boys out there. No one is perfect, certainly, but knowing how to treat a Mistress is essential to ever successfully attracting one. If you can't even manage to be respectful in a conversation, you are not ready.

Last night also reminded me that I am still firmly in control of this process. I felt like I was back in my element. For me perhaps the most powerful part of the evening was hearing the older women reinforce what I already knew, but their experience gives them a steadiness that I am still learning to achieve.

There was also a married couple there. The woman wore a key around her neck - a sure sign that she's got her husband locked in chastity. It touched me to see a successful, smart couple like that out in the world, making it work. There were other, older couples in attendance who've been together for several decades, and that also touched me. You can get very downtrodden in this lifestyle, thinking that things will always be fleeting and short-lived, that people will only disappoint you and that the voiced devotion of submissive boys is only that -- voiced, not real. To see people making it work was a kind of encouragement I didn't even know that I needed. After the last few months, especially, I needed to see that -- it moved me almost to tears.

They have a play party coming up, and I also got invitations to other events. Getting out there seems to be a vast improvement for me right now. I might even be able to put my sissy-training skills to work again someday.

One Domme, one city

I just recently had a month long affair with someone that required me to write a lot about myself, particularly my thoughts about the kink and my identity within that, and it made me realize that I do really enjoy that kind of writing. It is nice to air out that side of myself from time to time.

Unfortunately, that affair fell apart before it really even got off the ground, and now I'm once again in search of a partner -- the right partner this time. I'm looking for a boy to have as my very own, but finding the right boy takes time and patience. There will be some near-misses, some wasted time, and a little frustration along the way. My hope is that in recording this, beyond simply satisfying myself it will teach submissive men how to behave with respect to a Dominant woman -- in a truly selfless and service-oriented way, in a way that honors the Woman at the center of their lives. And hell yeah, maybe I'll get a few fawning readers out of it.

I've been in this lifestyle for a while, in one way or another. I think I've avoided the more formal scene-oriented groups because I've been afraid it reduced me too much to just my sexual orientation, despite the many other things in my life. Hey, I've even flirted with the idea of having a vanilla relationship, now and again. (Never works!) But I know what I like -- even if I try to think my way out of it, my body knows what it likes. There's no denying that, beyond a certain point. And I do want to find someone who is as comfortable with himself as I am with myself. I'm a little tired of the shy boys who skulk around on the internet and don't have the courage to pursue a real-time, honest relationship.

This past weekend, I spanked a firefighter and cleaned all my kit. I've recently come into possession of a really nice hood I'd love to use on someone, someday. Hooding is a new interest for me -- I didn't really get it before, but now I do. It deprives a boy completely of all outside stimuli, and he can lie there, trussed up and waiting for whenever I feel like getting back to him. The power in that is quite intoxicating. I also signed myself up for a local women's group, and we'll see what kind of people I meet there.

So this is a definitely positive start, which I need right now.